you might be a UU if...

Your child comes home from church saying, "Mom, guess what! Do you know another word for butt is buttocks? And it's spelled B-U-T-T-T-O-C-K-S? (sic)"

Yes, the boy is attending our church's premier K-1,Our Whole Lives sexuality class. Of course, he's taking it in stride---what else would you expect from a midwife's son? Esp. when I apprenticed at the birth of one of his teachers and was a doula for the other one. And why am I not teaching this class, you ask? Mainly because the trainings have all been out of town, and I haven't been willing to miss a birth to go to one. Beside that, I am teaching the 3rd graders. (I deliberately opted for grades the kids weren't in; I think it's valuable for them to learn from other people besides me.)

Getting trained is on my 'to do' list. However, I am beginning to wonder if I could be as diplomatic as the current teachers are. It's very surprising to me, but a couple of parents are having difficulties with the part of the curriculum that explains conception. See, there are two versions, one of which goes into more specifics and mechanics than the other. And anytime you give options to UUs...you get sincere wrangling, heartfelt discussion, working toward consensus and trying to please everyone, which, is valuable and good and all that but takes ever so much time and energy.
(Can you feel the youthful idealism slipping away?)

So, I wasn't taken by surprise by the UU need to discuss, but I was surprised that there were members who believed that these kids could 'lose their innocence' by learning specifics about how babies are conceived. That has not been the case with the girl, who, just this past weekend asked her musical friend's mom "How can that (meaning intercourse) feel good?" And even after the mom answered, quite well, I think, the girl and her friend were skeptical, and decided they wouldn't even do that to have kids; when the mom jokingly brought up IVF, they decided that it would be better to adopt than have anything 'up there'. An attitude quite appropriate for their age, and one that shows me their 'innocence' was not ruined by learning the details of conception when they were younger.

The girl, by the way, did not have the O.W.L. class. I just followed advice given me by my more senior partner midwives and from talking to the girl's preschool teachers; to just answer the questions she asked when she asked them. She didn't ask a lot, but 2 years or so ago, as we were browsing in our favorite local independent children's bookstore, Cover To Cover, she picked up a book called "First Comes Love" and asked me to buy it. I thought it was great; it talked about how all sorts of animals, reptiles, amphibians, mammals, even insects made babies. Humans were just one example of many. When we finished reading it, I asked the girl if she had any questions; she didn't.)

Well, I'm not too concerned with what version is chosen after all the discussion. I can certainly supplement at home. I just want to be sure that if any child in the class asks a question, even if it is about more specific info, (though I doubt it will be), that the teachers will feel free to answer completely and respectfully, so no child will feel shamed, or get the message that there is anything shameful about making babies. Hey, I got a vested interest here...job security and all that. Oh, and it would be good to have the boy grow up to have a well-adjusted attitude about sexuality too, I guess. ;)